Thursday, July 31, 2014

Jon Snow and the Archangel Michael.

If religion is the opium of the people then Pinot Grigio is the khat of Primrose Hill.

That’s the sort of thought that fills your mind on the early shift in the pub on a midweek Wednesday.

The early shift is the one after just after lunch and just before dinner and provides a home for those waiting for Jon Snow.

It was J.R.R.Tolkein who, taking time off from writing the Hobbit, once memorably penned:
“Ho! Ho! Ho! To the bottle I go; To heal my heart and drown my woe”.

It is not known if Lord of the Rings followed early doors at his local although some makes better sense as the the bottle lightens.

But it was only a small glass which provided company last night.

Your columnist always places himself at a table where he can survey the room - and get his order in quickly.

The pub itself would be described as traditional.The local celebrations next week to mark the start of World War One will clearly be held in the gents.

Beer is sold on the premises but at a price per pint which would involve charges of fraud elsewhere in the country. The tables are suitably sticky and the staff speak several languages including deafness and dumb insolence.

Having revealed earlier in the week that this is where Andrew Marr ignored me, it should be said he is not the only one.

There is the man opposite who pops in every night for a half and a mutter. He is distinguishable by his empty shopping trolley, sleeveless puffer jacket and baseball cap.

He, like Andrew, ignored me, which allowed my thoughts to drift in the direction of Ukip.

The arrival of NW1’s homage to Nigel Farage, is usually enough to clear the bar of early comers. But last night it also reminded onlookers of the party’s present perilous position in the west country seat of Wells.

Nigel has made much of his desire to turf out of his party those whose normal apparel fastens at the back with buckles and belts. However his candidate for Wells has quit claiming the local party has been taken over by the “Glastonbury occult crowd”.

The party’s county treasurer does run the local Angelic Guidance and Healing Centre where she is a soul midwife and shaman. She also claims the Archangel Michael as a co-worker.

It’s not known if she drinks Pinot Grigio.