Wednesday, March 26, 2014

PMQs March 26th - Ed and Dave - Conscious Coupling

With the nation already enraptured with the conscious uncoupling of Gwyneth and Chris, paying attention to the coupling of Dave and Ed was always going to be difficult.
To be fair, Prime Ministers Questions has never had quite the excitement of a Coldplay concert, but it has had its moments.

And one came today at four minutes into the noon when attempts to instill democratic debate were finally abandoned.
That is all the time it took for Speaker Bercow to accept his campaign for an end to Punch and Judy politics was over.
Indeed, P and J seemed to have been joined by the Baby, the Crocodile and the Policeman.
And if democracy is measured by decibels then the Tories will be in power for the next one hundred years.

Their back bench 'beserkers' were already over-excited before the main players arrived on the scene. But, as the Speaker made his first call for calm, the appearance of Ed seemed to send them over the top.

The Labour leader had started the day with a poll showing half his own supporters could not see him as the next PM.
As Tory MPs noisily concurred he looked on a hiding to nothing.
But, that was before the lanky frame of Energy Secretary Ed Davey was spotted trying to bend itself into the space between the Speaker's chair and the exit.

For this morning had also brought the promise of a price freeze until January 2016 by one of the Big Six energy companies.
Ed M was already expecting trouble following his less than impressive post budget performance.
But, an energy price freeze, backed by him and opposed by Dave, gave him just the get out of jail card he needed.

Energy Ed had been trundled out earlier to try to claim some of the credit for the Government but obviously decided out-of-sight was the only way ahead at PMQs. This left the PM in the firing line but, buoyed up by his own success in recent polls, he was more than up for the shouting that followed.

Ed shouted that the PM had got it wrong, Dave shouted he had got it right, back benchers just shouted. Speaker Bercow shouted himself hoarse appealing for an end to the shouting but he could not be heard because of the extra shouting going on.

As Dave went puce, Ed went pale; the PM got out his glasses and the Labour leader got out his index finger.

Chancellor George and his bruiser buddy Ed Balls looked on with pleasure, Foreign Secretary William Hague, making a rare state visit to the UK, looked on with alarm.

Looking on with indifference, Deputy PM Nick Clegg who tonight couples with
Nigel Farage.

Much more shouting later.